Hi all,Have you ever pressed Send on an email or a comment, and immediately wished you could take it back? With comments at least, often there's a chance to edit or even delete entirely. But sometimes there's no option and whatever you said is "out there" forever. Scary thought.
And have you ever posted something and then gone back and tweaked it? And tweaked it again. And then thought about how something you've written might be taken the wrong way, and gone back and edited it again. And again. And again. And then still had that sick feeling in your stomach that you're going to offend someone?
And what about if someone does take umbrage? Do you feel physically ill and horrified and take it extremely personally, even though it's only one person's opinion and you're smart enough to know that not everyone will agree with you, and that you can't please everyone?
I'm guilty of all of the above. In spades and then some. To the extent where my post might be already published and then is edited a number of times before I reluctantly leave it be.... at least until the next day, when I re-read it and blanch at a particular phrase and tweak it again.
I entered into a discussion yesterday and now I'm kinda wishing I hadn't. Because sometimes, no matter how carefully you craft that post or that email or that comment, you're going to rub someone up the wrong way. And inevitably, as more people enter into the fray, your original post gets taken even more out of context and your original intentions are overwhelmed by the juggernaut that is going public on the internet.
When am I gonna learn to keep my mouth shut (or my fingers off that Send key) so that the only people I unintentionally annoy end up being a fictional characters in my current manuscript?
Well, hopefully one day I'll learn. And perhaps I'll end up being the perfect woman, like the one in this video:
And yes, actually I do love little kittens!
;-)
M
6 comments:
There is no way that you're always going to please everyone.
Yes, it's good to think about what you say before you say it, or type it, for that matter. I've griped about that several times myself, but you also have to be free to express yourself. It's all about finding that line. :)
Haaaa! I do love kittens :)
If I can, I try to avoid Internet drama (i.e. some of the bigger blogs, lol) but like you said, sometimes, no matter how good your intentions, things just blow up. I don't know what situation you're talking about but I'm sure whatever it is, will eventually smooth over.
Oh yes. I edit comments and posts ALL THE TIME. And I'm always doing this "tweet and delete!" thing because all of the sudden I get worried about what I just said.
I'm very careful and good with work email, though, because there's no getting it back once you hit "send"...and it can get forwarded to anyone!
More and more I find myself typing up an email and then just deleting it. Unfortunately, this also extends to commenting on loops when people need assistance or whatever, too. Because then if something you recommend doesn't work, they might come back at you. Sign of the times, I guess. And with people able to access practically anything you've posted online, it's easy for publishing professionals to form opinions of you based entirely on your online persona. Yikes. I'm totally screwed then, LOL.
And as for this situation, well, I'm sure if I showed the thread to my DH he'd tell me I have nothing to worry about and there is no "situation". But I read a couple of responses and felt yuck and took them personally. And wished I'd not commented at all. As you do. "Little kittens", here I come!
Why can't we all just get along? ;-)
Seriously, you can't please all of the people, all the time. I know, I tried for thirty years but there really is no pleasing some people and it's a total exercise in frustration (one thing I don't need to tone!)
Your good peeps, don't let the crap load on bad ones bog you down.
Jennifer, LOL! Yeah, my frustration levels sure as heck don't need any more toning. Now if only I could map that across to the rest of my saggy bits ;-)
Seriously though, thanks for the excellent advice. Now I just have to remember to take it, right?
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